IN THE VERY BEGINNING, IT WAS TOUGH AS HELL
Warning: Adult language
Please do not read any further if you are offended by adult language.
This is me right before I started my weight loss journey, tipping the scale at 262 pounds. I was completely miserable with myself and was very depressed.
After my first two weeks of eating right, I started to feel better physically and emotionally. I was feeling pretty good about things. To be honest, I really didn't feel ready to embark on this seemingly impossible task but I had found resolve. I was going to do this whether I wanted to or not and I was running with the mantra...
Fake it til you make it.
Two weeks in, I started exercising. I was doing about 15-20 minutes of weight training and weight resistance by means of dumbbells, lunges, and squats. In addition, I was doing about 15-20 minutes of the Wii fit.
After about a month, I dropped the Wii fit. It wasn't getting my heart rate up consistently and I wasn't really even sweating. Believe me, at 260+ pounds and completely out of shape, it should've been doing something. So I replaced that with a Wii workout program called My Fitness Coach. I did either a 15 min workout or a 30 min workout depending on my schedule, my mood, and how sore I was.
{ Find out how my exercise regimen progressed and what worked for me very well in my article, “I Hated Exercise. How Was I Ever Going To Do This?” }
*I need to mention that the sequel program to My Fitness Coach, My Fitness Coach 2, sucks big time, IMO. It was nothing like the first one and I actually hated it. It did nothing for my fitness whatsoever.
On average, I was working out around 30-45 minutes/day. Everyday. No excuses. I hated it but I knew it had to be done. Some days I would do the 'let's try to talk myself out of the working out' thing all day long and find myself working out at 10pm. But I always did it. There were days my muscles were so sore or I would be sick and hacking up a lung...NO EXCUSES. I did it no matter what. It sucked ass but I made a promise to myself and I knew I had to put 150% into this. So I went balls-to-the-wall.
And then I had my first weigh-in...
NADA.
Not one friggin pound.
And then I had my second weigh-in, NOTHING. Two more weigh-ins later... still nothing.
I wanted to cry until I couldn't cry anymore. I wanted to curl in a ball in bed. I was completely and utterly devastated. For an entire month, I ate perfectly and worked out every day. Every single damn day. WTH was going on? I did lose three inches but that didn't console me, it didn't even come close. My husband Jay was wonderful. He saw how hard I was working and he knew I was doing everything right. I was exercising, I was eating enough (but not too much), and I was eating lots of vegetables, lean meats, whole grains, and cut out all the crap foods. He would tell me to hang in there, that I was building muscle, and that it would all start to come together. He promised me. But I didn't believe it.
I cried a lot over it, I was scared something was wrong with me. I mean how the hell can a 262 pound woman who lived like a sloth for 10 years and ate like a sumo wrestler NOT have results after exercising everyday and eating correctly? I could not fathom it and I processed all of it as a failure. I was a failure. I was destined to be fat and miserable. Yes, I had my pity party moments. I'm not proud of it, but I'm human and hell, I was at a loss. But guess what? I allowed myself times to pout, but I would snap myself out of it and get back on that damn horse. I never gave up... but it was so damn hard not to.
At my FOUR MONTH mark of working out everyday and eating right, I still had not lost any weight.
For the level of dedication and intensity I was putting into this, there should've definitely been some success. I was sooo discouraged. Something going on, something was wrong. I was certain.
I called my regular doctor and they suggested I go see a nutritionist. I stated I was eating correctly and didn't think that was the problem. I had worked with a nutritionist during my pregnancies (due to having gestational diabetes with both of my pregnancies) and was certain I knew how to eat. But I went ahead and made the appointment anyway. Sure enough, I was eating perfectly. I had been writing down everything I was eating and I had an exercise log. The nutritionist was impressed with my knowledge (ya, too bad I didn't put it to use years ago) and told me I was in fact doing everything right. Now what?
I decided to make an appointment with the nutritionist I had seen during my pregnancies. I really liked her and she taught me most of what I knew anyway. Maybe she would have some answers. It turned out she did. I found out I had something called Insulin Resistance.
{ Read my most popular article where I list all of the Real Life Weight Loss Tips that helped me lose over 120 pounds. }
What is Insulin Resistance?
Insulin Resistance is when your insulin levels are chronically elevated. High insulin levels cause more glucose to be converted to fat and stored in fat cells. Even worse, insulin also prevents the release of fat from the fat cells. So the fat gets trapped inside the fat cells and often no matter what amount of diet or exercise your doing, that fat stays trapped. People with insulin resistance (and most don't know they have it) have a lot of trouble losing weight. Insulin resistance can lead to many metabolic disorders, mainly type 2 diabetes. Ok, so now what? Well, the plan was to keep doing what I was doing but make some minor changes. First, cut out all refined and processed foods. For the most part, I honestly was already doing that, but I was drinking diet pop and sometimes eating those 100 calorie pack snacks. Also, I was to increase the weight training. Weight training exercises are known to help tremendously with insulin resistance. Again, I was already doing this, but I took it up a notch.
I have to interject here though and restate, I was feeling better. I felt more healthy and stronger. I knew something right and good was happening inside me but damn, I wanted to drop the weight. Every weigh-in resulted in me crying. But I never gave up. And I mean never. NOT ONCE did I sneak a cookie, or skip a workout, or have an extra helping. Believe me or don't believe me. But I was dead serious about this. I had failed over and over for 10 years trying to lose weight. This time I was determined to once and for all lose this damn weight. It was cut-throat time.
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After doing some research on my own, I found evidence from studies that ingesting cinnamon on a daily basis did wonders in regulating blood sugar. I started sipping cinnamon tea like it was going out of style and using stevia as my sweetener. I even would put a teaspoon of ceylon cinnamon in every other coffee that I drank! Hey, the research was there to prove the results. I was going to do everything I could to get past this hurdle!I also started baking a lot more with cinnamon.
Important Note:
Because cinnamon is so very effective in lowering blood sugar levels, IF YOU ARE DIABETIC please talk to your doctor before adding a lot of cinnamon into your daily diet. If you are already on medication to lower your blood sugar, you may dip below healthy levels with excessive cinnamon intake.
Some great cinnamon recipes to try are crockpot applesauce, 2-minute cinnamon apples, apple pie muffins, cinnamon vanilla chia seed pudding, and apple cinnamon pancakes.
I would NOT be the reason for failure this time. If my body wasn't going to cooperate and it was going to 'resist' losing weight, it wasn't going to be because of me.
I am a stubborn. There were times I was hating life and I wanted to give up a hundred times. I REFUSED. It was war. I honestly looked at it like war. I am not kidding. This bitch was not going down without a fight.
I was sick of being fat and unhappy. I was sick of not even being able to get comfortable in a chair or in my bed. It broke my heart that my 3 1/2 year old couldn't wrap her arms around me and give me a hug. I was done living this way.
I was so upset that after all these years I finally got off my ass and was truly putting in the effort and work, yet nothing was happening. I was more than upset. I was fucking livid. For a reason I can't explain, instead of getting pissed and giving up (like I did for the past decade), it made me even more determined to succeed.
I never before in my life felt this strongly. Before I would have given up months and months ago. I don't know what it was this time but I just knew this was my last chance. If I wasn't gonna do this before I turned 40, I wasn't gonna do it. Everybody is different. For me, I just knew this was my last chance for happiness and good health. And it was on. It was on like fucking Donkey Kong.
SOMETHING GLORIOUS HAPPENED AFTER 4 MONTHS.
My body got on board with the damn program. I can't explain it but one day I woke up and everything felt in sync. Almost immediately, I began noticing my clothes getting bigger on me and I started looking smaller. I mean, I looked noticeably smaller each week. I started shrinking. I was still huge and most people who didn't know me well didn't see any differences. But I did. And I wasn't imagining it. Oh, it was ON. I was psyched and it lit a new and even more intense fire under my ass.
The tweaks I made in my nutrition by cutting out more refined foods and adding lots of cinnamon made a big difference. Focusing more on my weight training made a difference too! It all worked together and helped catapult me past my obstacle.
I upped the weight training and weight resistance exercises even more and for a longer amount of time. I was also doing the My Fitness Coach workouts 30 minutes a day and let me tell you, those were getting intense. The program is set up so that it grows more difficult as you get stronger and more fit. That shit was a sweat fest, FO SHO. It took 4 long grueling months, but I finally hit my stride. And let me tell you folks, it never let up.
I never hit a plateau after those 4 months. NEVER. My journey went on for almost 20 more months and I never hit another plateau.
Now, I wasn't dropping crazy amounts of weight, but it was slow and steady. I averaged a five pound weight loss each month as well as losing around 4-5 inches every month, give or take.
But after all that I went through those first four months, it was freakin' awesome to see the scale, the measuring tape, and my clothes all showing signs of success...consistently. I attribute never hitting another plateau to the large amount of muscle mass I had gained and continued to gain. All that muscle was keeping my metabolism going and was burning calories for me all day long.
I think a lot of people look at me now and just see the successes. And although I think that's completely normal and is probably the reaction that every weight loss story gets, I thought it was so important to share the failures too. It needed to be told how shitty the beginning was for me. It sucked major balls. I was beside myself. I thought all my hard work was for nothing and that I truly was destined to be fat my whole life. But I stuck with it and because of it I learned an invaluable lesson.
HARD WORK IS NOT WASTED!
For me, it took my body forever to get with the program and bust through what was holding it back. But it was all that hard work that finally made it happen. If I would have given up, it would have been the end of me. I would've never tried again. I would have justified it by saying 'I did the right thing for months and months and never cheated and it didn't work, so why bother'.
Perseverance and dedication can overcome anything. I truly believe that now. With every ounce of me, I believe it. Never give up, never look back, and keep on fighting. It is so absolutely and so incredibly....worth it.
"I do not think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature."
~ John D. Rockefeller
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*The information on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content in this article is for general information purposes only. I am not a doctor, nor am I a dietitian. Talk to your physician before making any changes in your diet or exercise regimen. The information found in this article is from various sources which include, but are not limited to, the sites listed above. I encourage you to do your own research and talk with your physician before making any changes in diet or exercise. What has worked for me may not work for you. This information in this article or on this website should never replace or serve as medical advice.
NEVER DISREGARD PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE OR DELAY SEEKING MEDICAL TREATMENT BECAUSE OF SOMETHING YOU HAVE READ ON OR HAVE ACCESSED THROUGH THIS WEB SITE.
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