My 120 Pound Journey: What I Did in My First Two Weeks

Warning: Adult language

Please do not read any further if you are offended by adult language.

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When I was heavy, if someone was taking my picture, I'd grab anything that was near me and put it in front of my body to try to hide my fat. In this case, I grabbed my hubby's arm. I HATED getting my picture taken.

**Here's another example of me trying to hide my fat. I grabbed my daughter's little coat and held it in front of my stomach to hide myself.**

What did I do in the first two weeks of my weight loss journey? Well, I wasn't going to join a gym. That's for damn sure. The thought of walking my giant ass in a gym full of hard bodies terrified me. Not to mention how humiliated I would've been when everything would start jiggling, I'd be gasping for breath, and would be sweating profusely... BEFORE I even started working out. No way. There was no way in hell.

I was confused as to what I should do for exercise, so I gave myself two weeks and TWO WEEKS ONLY to get my eating habits secured and figured out. For the first two weeks, I emptied my house of all the junk food, filled it with healthy food, and worked on meal plans and snacks. What was I going to do for exercise? I didn't know. So for those first two weeks, I didn't exercise. I ate healthy, tried to get my mind in the game, and researched exercise programs. I was so morbidly obese and it was so difficult to even walk or bend, I knew I had to start small. So I spent a lot of time on the internet printing out beginner home workouts and tried to psych myself up to start the exercise part of my weight loss journey.

In hindsight, knowing what I know now and feeling what I feel now, I wish I would've tried joining a gym in the beginning. I didn't join a gym until I felt like I 'belonged' there. I was SO wrong.

We ALL belong there.

I guess I had it in my mind that everyone walking around was going to be some gorgeous beach babe or muscle dude. Ugh, the things we tell ourselves. Once I finally did start going to a gym I realized every single stage of getting healthy is represented there. I also found out that the gym community is not like the outside world (you know, where most people are assholes). The gym community welcomes everybody.

Fit-minded people love to see people coming to the gym and working hard to get healthy. They are encouraging and friendly. In my experience, I have actually found the more unhealthy you are and the more overweight you are, the more encouraging they are to you. Healthy and fit people are in general happier and more contented people. They are this way to a large extent because of how their lifestyle makes them feel, mind, body, and soul and they want others to feel the same way.

What did I do when I first started my weight loss journey?

The very first thing I did before I embarked on my weight loss journey was take measurements of my body and weigh myself. I was scared to do it, but you have to get a baseline of where you're starting. Step your ass on that scale and whatever it says, bite the bullet. Throughout the whole 'losing weight' thing, the scale will give you a rough idea of how things are going but it doesn't tell you the whole story. In fact, it can really trip you up and discourage you at times. I know it did for me.

BIG TIME.

If I would get on the scale and it wouldn't budge (which happened a lot for me), I would be devastated. My hubs, Jay, would tell me every single time that it was okay and that I was doing everything right and that I just needed to let it happen without trying to force it. He used to, and still does actually, poke fun of how I would sneak up on the scale. I'd take a full minute to get on it, like it was going to read me lighter if I tip-toed up on it all stealth-style. He made me laugh every time because it was true, I tried to outsmart it or something.

Honestly though, the scale can sabotage you and all of your efforts. At one point the hubs threatened to smash the scale to smithereens if I didn't stop being so obsessed with the scale. Let me tell ya folks, he was dead ass serious.

Months went by and I continued to obsess and cry and stress over what that scale was saying. For four months, I had not lost any weight even though I was doing everything right. After several appointments with doctors and nutritionists, I came to find out I had Insulin Resistance**, which prevents weight loss. For months I had no idea I had this. But once I knew about the insulin resistance, I was able to make further changes and overcome it. But man, I had some hard days before that hurdle was jumped.

{For a more detailed look at my struggle with insulin resistance, check out my article, "In The Beginning It Was Tough As Hell").

I would get on the scale and become inconsolable. I would cry for days. Making good on his word, I soon had a scale in a hundred pieces. My husband destroyed the scale and vowed I'd never shed another tear because of that wretched thing. I was pissed at first. I felt like I 'needed' it to track my progress. But after a few days of knowing it wasn't there, I felt liberated. It was only then, in it's absence, that I truly realized it was holding me back. It was making me second guess myself and making me crazy.

This is why you MUST take monthly measurements of your body.

Find someone you trust to do your measurements. I know it's hard. Believe me, I stood there and cried the entire time Jay took my first measurements. I sobbed with my hands covering my face. It was horrible. But guess what, so is being fat and unhealthy. The whole process of getting healthy and changing your whole life is hard, you might as well start it off the same way. Just do it.

Because here's the dealio. The scale can refuse to budge and say you haven't lost an ounce but if you've lost 4 inches, you ARE smaller. Which means you ARE on the right track! It took me a while to believe that but it is the truth.

The scale cannot tell the story of what is going on inside your body, it doesn't know if it's weighing muscle, fat, or a damn stack of books. If you are exercising and building muscle, you will gain weight in muscle. But that's okay. That's good! That's what you want! As the muscle gets bigger and stronger, it tightens and pulls everything in and makes you firm and toned. As the muscles grow and get bigger, you actually get smaller.

DON'T believe the myth that weight training will make you bulky or 'mannish'. There is a very, VERY specific way you must train in order to become a body builder. Believe me, by picking up some dumbbells, doing bodyweight resistance exercises, and partaking in just about any muscle building exercise, you will NOT get bulky. You will become leaner, toned, sculpted, and SMALLER. Muscle is three times more dense than fat but yet takes up less space in your body.

The bottom line is that the scale is a liar!

Things are going to be rearranging and changing inside you. Rely more on your measurements. Measure your arms, bust, waist, hips, upper thighs, and calves and measure them in the exact same place every month. Do this faithfully. Buy a journal to record the numbers. At the end of your journey, you can look back at all the hard work that you put in.

Oh and BTW, I actually did end up getting a new scale. But only after I knew I could look at it in a realistic way and not take a lot of stock into what it said. And... I only weighed myself once a month when I would take my measurements. That's it. No more sneaking up on it in between measurement dates.

What else did I do when I first started my weight loss journey?

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I immediately changed my eating.

I stopped eating the junk. We all know what the junk is...sweets, fast food, chips, candy, ice cream, etc. I immediately saw a difference in my mood. I'm not sure about anybody else, but sugar makes me mean and irritable. The more I eat, the more I want and it makes me moody as hell. My brother Cha (Charlie) is the same exact way. We have a predisposition to diabetes in my family (we have it on both sides and it runs rampant). However, anybody (predisposition or not) can succumb to sugar addiction, even our small children. Sugar addiction is real.

"Like cocaine and other drugs, sugar activates the reward system in the brain. Rats hooked on sugar show classic symptoms of addiction, including tolerance, withdrawal and cravings, and have been known to bypasscocaine in favor of their primary drug of choice: sugar." ~ David Sack, M.D.

In my first two weeks, I cut out all white foods (obviously sugar, potatoes, white rice, cereal, bread, pasta, etc.). I switched to whole grains. I switched to sweet potatoes, brown rice, quinoa, steel cut oats, brown rice pasta, and Ezekiel breads. I have to say...it actually tastes better. I'm serious. My husband absolutely refused to eat anything whole grain and he continued to do so for nearly TWO YEARS! After two years of prodding, he finally agreed to try whole grains. Guess what? He really, REALLY liked them! He says all the time how he had no idea it actually tasted good and how it tastes better than white foods. He says that whole grains have more flavor and texture. He even has his own special whole grain bread that he loves and he has to make sure we don't run out of it. Ha, ya, who would've thunk it.

Why don't husbands just listen to their wives? We know shit.

White foods spike your sugar immediately. In fact, they are so simple of a carbohydrate, they start digesting in your mouth BEFORE you even swallow it. How gross is that?! EW! The saliva in your mouth is enough to start breaking down the carbohydrate.

Now that tells you right there, that if a food is already starting to breakdown before it even gets to your stomach, there's not going be much fuel and energy left over to sustain your body and help it function. Your body absorbs these foods quickly. They increase blood sugar, trigger a release of insulin, and an hour later you're hungry again. Whole wheat and whole grains have subsistence and are filling and they carry enough energy with them to fuel you and provide nutrients. The health benefits in eating whole grains far outweighs the benefits in eating white foods.

Not only did I change what I was eating, but I ate more often.

I started eating about every 3 hours and ate smaller portions. Six years later, I still do this. I NEVER feel hungry and always feel like my body is always fueled up. I don't have highs and lows anymore. My blood sugar levels stay even all day. I hardly ever have cravings. And believe me, it's MUCH easier making healthy choices if you're not really hungry.

After just 2 weeks of eating properly, I felt remarkably different. No more half-comas from overloading my body with crap food and spiking my blood sugar. No more extreme moodiness throughout the day. No more feeling so sluggish and bogged down. I hadn't lost any weight yet (because of my insulin resistance), but I felt good... and I knew I was onto something.

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you can be onto something too. Just make those first baby steps, those first small changes and you will gain momentum as you go. You will hit bumps and detours along the road, but overcoming them will make you even stronger and will fuel your passion and determination even more. With each hurdle you get through, you'll gain confidence in yourself. You'll start to realize you can really, actually do this. I'm living proof that you can do this. I KNOW you can do this.

You got this.

{ If you'd like even more information, HERE IS A STEP-BY-STEP PROGRAM for your first two weeks! }